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This couple tries to spice up their sex life with the help of some creepy crawlers and dirty talk. All I wanna know his how many bars of chocolate did it take to bribe miss piggy into doing this? I'd do it myself for a 24 pack of Holiday Spice. Why the fuck won't Pepsi bring that shit back?
Date: 11.16.08 Views: 309,103 Comments: 0
That sick motherfucker. No for real, I'm actually jealous. I tried to suck my own dick on a nightly basis from ages 12 to 19 but I could never reach. There was just too much distance between my 2 inch penis and mouth. So close... yet so far.
Date: 11.15.08 Views: 246,199 Comments: 0
Netflix sent me this one. No joke. I'm still trying to figure out how the fuck it ended up in my "movies you'll love" section. The only other shit I've ever rented off there was some Steven Segal classics and weight loss DVD's. I just don't see the connection. Anyway, the movie is called Emmanuelle Around The World, check it out.
Date: 11.14.08 Views: 678,070 Comments: 0
This woman has a rare condition known as Gigantomastia. Basically its when you grow titties bigger than watermelons and you end up having back problems for the rest of your life. Please god, create a similar condition that affects penis growth. I can handle the back pain, I promise.
Date: 11.13.08 Views: 221,318 Comments: 0
Looks like this bitch has put a price tag on herpes. It's disheartening to see Pakistan's prostitution standards sink so low. This woman looks as though she was deficated out of a John Candy's deceased asshole. Okay well realistically I'd fuck her but only if I was paid 50k in cash up front and was permitted to chant "allah akbar" as I cock slap her.
Date: 11.12.08 Views: 333,824 Comments: 0
Seriously, this is the greatest video I've seen all month. At first I just thought it was some guys spying on their friend as he got a blowjob or some shit. Let me tell you this, if that's all that happened, it wouldn't be on here. Now prepare yourself for the beastmaster 5000.
Date: 11.11.08 Views: 817,913 Comments: 0
I like his Chuck Norris style somersault but I have mixed feelings about the use of chocolate syrup. Sure it'll easily mask the bitter taste of her cornhole but in the end how's he gonna be able to differienate syrup from shit? It's a dangerous game that salad tossing is.
Date: 11.10.08 Views: 481,294 Comments: 0
Unless you see what I see: A man in a bear mask being ass fucked by animatronic reindeer. Yeah so apparently they started making the animal versions of those 'sex dolls' to suit the needs of zoophiles around the globe. I hear you can pick up a miniature stallion, fully loaded, for under $500 on ebay.
Date: 11.9.08 Views: 453,687 Comments: 0
I posted this a long ass time ago but I just realized it was missing some key components, such as our Spanish starlet recieving an abrupt facial as she criticizes the cameraman for his 'ignorance'. Just a friendly reminder: when you're sitting butt naked on the floor of a Motel 6 having just been just ass fucked by a complete stranger, try not to engage in a verbal battle of wits with your employer. There's no winning. Download the full video @ LATIN ABUSE.
Date: 11.8.08 Views: 472,811 Comments: 0
When your penis just can't get the job done, you gotta resort to other body parts. The fist is the limb of choice for most of those big-pussied sluts, but of course there's always gonna be some with even more demanding needs. In this video the guy uses his foot, but keep in mind you can always skull fuck them too. Just shave your head 1st for the sake of hygiene.
Date: 11.7.08 Views: 429,701 Comments: 0
It would look something like this, minus Michael Keaton. And while we're on the subject of x-rated spoofs, would anyone care to sign my petition to have The Elephant Man remade into an adult film? I'd very much like to see that mongloid fella give Sasha Gray some ATM.
Date: 11.6.08 Views: 312,406 Comments: 0
Did anyone else see Krang from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles hanging out inside of her war-torn vagina? I'll be damned if that isn't him. Anyways, I gotta maintain tradition here folks. Videos like this always awaken an ungodly hunger for the roast beef. I'm off to Arbys.
Date: 11.5.08 Views: 363,779 Comments: 0
A Twin Turbo Geo Metro Convertible - that's the prize. Object of the game? I'm actually still trying to figure that part out, but I think it has something to do with how many eels you're capable to sticking up your ass. Sounds like fun but I'm partial to Monoply.
Date: 11.4.08 Views: 608,800 Comments: 0
Fuck, that's a hell of a way to mop a floor. It's inspiring really. So how exactly would one apply this kind of creativity to cleaning up their bathroom? I've got shit stains on my toilet dating back from 1997 and the only way I'm gonna get off my ass and do something about it is if it involves a naked woman.
Date: 11.3.08 Views: 542,875 Comments: 0
Damn. I could really use some service like this. At 325 pounds, I'm lucky if I can even find my cock, let alone put it to use. Sign me up for 2 whores, along with 4 beefcakes to handle all movement.
Date: 11.2.08 Views: 682,577 Comments: 0

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